The Move.....

Somehow I made it through Second Grade. Friends were few (that I can remember). Who would want to be friends with a girl who was (a) taller than the rest of the class, (b) cried alot, (c) got the 'ruler' from the teacher and (d)was extremely unliked by Sister Something.

During the summer of the end of second grade my family moved to a nearby small city. Thankfully, we still lived near the woods and there was much to explore around the neighborhood. Since I felt so comfortable being alone and in the woods, it was normal for me to go off and find comfort with my new friend ... a wonderful old tree that I found. It was to be named The Great Oak. That tree was huge and, if you could climb to the top (which I never did for a number of years) you could actually see the local drive-in theatre. But exploring the woods was only part of my summer vacation. I was also big sister to two siblings and soon to be a third. Babysitting was now taking up more and more of my time.

Oh, by the way, our new home was just across the street from a Catholic Church. Our new church!! Not only that, but I was enrolled in another Catholic School. I had to be bussed to this school and the bus stop was a half mile walk from my house. Again I had to walk alone.

In second grade Sister Something was now being replaced with Sister Evil. Second Grade and in a new school with an 'english' name in a 'french' catholic school. I truly didn't fit in. I was shy, and when the nuns called my name it sounded horribly awful. Yep, I wasn't going to make too many friends right away. I got alot of stares and giggles, especially when the nuns screached my name. The second graders were cute and petite and mostly of french background. I was getting taller, and was very thin and I was had an english surname. Eventually, someone in school nicknamed me the Jolly Green Giant. I think it was one of the boys. Would this lonliness ever end.

Sister Evil wore a different style dress (or habit, as the nuns called their clothing). But again, it was a long, black flowing dress where she too hid a ruler. (What is it with nuns and rulers??). During my year in this classroom, I came to SEE that if you were petite, cute and had a french surname that the nuns loved you. Me, well I wasn't any of those things. Something in me seemed to make the nuns dislike me. I felt like fingernails on a blackboard. What could possibly be wrong with me. I can clearly remember Sister Evil not allowing me go to the bathroom when I asked. The result was that I peed in class one day when Sister Evil denied me lavatory privileges. How embarassing is that!?!

While in school, the class would study french lessons and religion in the morning - every morning. We had a book that we would memorize the questions and answers that were all about God. I didn't speak french, didn't understand french. But was thrown into this new world and did my best to adapt and to learn.

To this day, I remember the first question/answer I had to memorize from my religion book: "Qui vous mame sur la terre? Sai le bon dieu qui mame sur la terre. (SORRY, CAN'T REMEMBER ALL MY FRENCH SPELLING, BUT IT TRANSLATES TO: Who put me on earth. God put me on earth). I've always wondered why God put me on earth.

But I didn't think about God too much at first. I was too busy wondering about my self. What was wrong with me? Why didn't the teachers like me? Who could I go to with my questions? Well it obviously wasn't the nuns. Nor was it my mother, who was a stressed out martyr-type. Mom didn't talk to me much either. And so I never went to her with the many questions that were building in my head and being. I was mom's babysitter. She couldn't wait for me to come home from school, so I could take the young out to play.

Then one day in church during the priest's sermon, he was pondering on and on about God and his everpresence. HE sees all, knows all. Then, the following was directed at us children. The priest said that God knew everything we did. That we needed to be very good boys and girls. That no matter where we were we couldn't hide from the all-seeing eye of God. Whoa, I hadn't thought about that! God could see me all the time. How rude, I thought. How scary is that.

Leaving church I made this decision: I was not going to let God see me naked. Now I had something else to worry about. What was I going to do when I had to take a bath, go to the bathroom, change my clothes???? Wholly cow, I had a whole new set of worries to think about and not just today, but for every day of my life. And remember that I still worried about brushing my teeth and opening my mouth for fear a tape worm would come up through my throat.

No wonder I grew up to be a 'worry wart'. Just another thing to add to my worry list - I was now officially a worrier. Whew....this life was definitely going not going to be easy. AND IT WASN'T/ISN'T.